NO Adventure

Posted by: noadventure | March 30, 2009

Angola Prison Rodeo

Like Oktoberfest at Deutsches Haus, the Angola Prison Rodeo takes place every weekend in October and even one bonus weekend in the spring. For 2009, the spring dates are April 18th and 19th.

If you haven’t been before, I definitely recommend it. It’s MAN vs. BEAST for these prisoners who have nothing to lose.

I don’t remember all of the events, but in one of them, four prisoners sit around a poker table while a wild bull goes absolutely fucking nuts. The last one still sitting at the table wins the prize(around$150 – which is like millions in prison).

pokertable

Another event I recall is this one where another gigantic bull has a poker chip on string tied between his horns. The object is simple: be the prisoner that retrieves the poker chip. The reward: 150 bucks.

You can bet your boots that somebody’s going to the prison hospital.

injuredcon

That’s gotta hurt. Face down under an airborne bull.

airbull

This tiny bull is as mean as the day is long. He takes no prisoners(I’m hysterical!).

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Here’s a trailer for a documentary about the Angola Prison Rodeo – it looks pretty cool. Check out how far the guy flies in the air during the poker event.

The rodeo is also an awesome place to pick up crafts, paintings of Tupac, or a belt buckle.

tupac-james-dolan

The only thing that really sucks about the rodeo is that no alcohol is available – it’s on prison grounds. Shucks! I kinda like drinking beer when I watch prisoners get maimed by wild animals. Anywho, the APR is still highly entertaining without booze.

While you’re in town, maybe you should checkout the nearby Secret Ancient Cypress Forest. It’s worth a few snapshots.

Expert tip: don’t get shanked in the neck – the prisoners will try to fuck the wound hole.

9 Comments

Posted in fall, festival, rodeo, sports, Uncategorized, wild animals

Posted by: noadventure | March 23, 2009

Make a Movie

FEATURED ON STREETCARNAGE.COM

Bored? Maybe you should make a movie.

There are a few simple rules to follow.

1) Have a great story.
2) Show, don’t tell.
3) Make a movie that YOU(and other people) would actually want to see.

Ask yourself, “Is this awesome?” If the answer is “yes,” proceed. You are doing a good job.

First you’ll need a small crew. Although other art forms can be done by one person, a movie is usually a collaborative effort(unless your name is Vincent Gallo).
crew

Move the camera around on a dolly. Dynamic, moving shots give your movie production value and make it less like a student film.
dollycrew

REAL special effects and stunts can be achieved if you know what you’re doing. They also look way better than computer effects(just think original Star Wars trilogy vs. new ones).

D.I.Y. Wire-work:

zerogback

Talented Up-and-Coming FX makeup:

makeup

Ruggedly handsome space-pioneering rappers:

monitorodoms

Use your resources. Maybe you know an alien that can breakdance – see if he’s available.
alienstall

Remember, unlike a song or a painting which you can create and enjoy by yourself, the purpose of a movie is to be seen. No one should spend time, money, and energy to make a movie that doesn’t have an audience. It’s a wasteful shame, but out of the 40+ feature films I’ve worked on, more than 10 have never seen the light of day. Think of all the useful ways that money and time could have been spent!

Anything worth doing is worth doing well.

7 Comments

Posted in art, how to, movies, streetcarnage.com, Uncategorized

Posted by: noadventure | March 14, 2009

Cheer Up

I’ve been working a ton lately, so get off my ass. I’ll post more soon. In the meantime… cheer up – you’ve got it pretty fucking good.

Rock Climbing

This is the Mississippi River Delta, and while it’s an excellent place to have as a port for America to the rest of the world, there hasn’t been alot of climb-able rock here for about 50 thousand fucking years.

Back in college, I worked at ClimbMax on Canal Boulevard, which is sadly no longer with us. In the tradition of MOVIE PITCHERS and the MERMAID LOUNGE, ClimbMax was a dingy little hangout that had a core crew that either climbed or loitered at the gym during all hours.

Current Rock Climbing options in New Orleans:

METEORITE IN AUDUBON PARK
gwrocksc1

Legend has it that this meteorite came from outer space and crashed right here on the golf course, smashing some guys foot and totally ruining the day(Ok, I just made that up). At around 6 feet tall, you can climb it pretty easily and get bored with it even easilier(really a word?).

SLIDELL ROCKS
Only a thirty minute drive from New Orleans, this gym is actually pretty damn tall and way fun.

My first experience at Slidell Rocks was quite a contrast to all the sweaty summer nights I spent pulling moves in ClimbMax with my bouldering buddies. This place is sterile and has ice-cold AC. You won’t be slipping off the holds or burying your hands in chalk.

Their bouldering cave also rocks.

HOME ROCK WALLS(AKA WOODIES)

Here is a photo of my home wall I built in my apartment in college. Yes, it was the nineties, but I still don’t know why I designed it to look like the cover of a Trapper Keeper.
college-wall_21

There was a small clan of dudes who would come over and climb this tiny wall; the only thing I can compare it to is skateboarding with friends. We would climb at each other’s houses on our home walls, watch climbing VHS tapes, and bullshit endlessly about climbing and dream trips we would probably never take.

When I became an “adult” and moved into my first custom house, I decided I wanted to re-spark my love of climbing. Much to the disapproval of my wife, I commissioned a carpenter to build a 145 square footer in my den. Checkout the following embarrassing video from a themed couples shower we had before we got married.

THE STORY:
1 I’m wasted.
2 The bald guy is my father-in-law.
3 I’m determined to climb a route without help.
4 Notice the 40oz beer bottle on the table.

No regrets on having that wall built(and thanks to my wife for taking care of my hangover).

2 Comments

Posted in climbing, fitness, socializing, urban

Posted by: noadventure | March 8, 2009

Journey to the Westbank – Part 3: Asia Minor

HONG KONG MARKET – huge Asian grocery store as big as a regular supermarket.
insidestore1

This supermarket on 925 Behrman Hwy in Gretna will blow your mind. Think of the stuff Andrew Zimmern eats on Bizarre Foods.

If you’re hungry when you get there, check out Pho Dahn 7 inside the freaking place or grab a Vietnamese poboy at the bakery also inside. Both are tasty options. Make sure you take some time for all the weird fruits you’ve never seen before and strange energy drinks from Thailand like Commando Bear 2000 which is jacked up with loads of Taurine and I believe also Nicotine.
commando_bear

And you don’t need me to tell you that fish can not get be found fresher than LIVE. Pick your live Vietnamese catfish, tilapia, dungeness crab, or Australian lobster straight from their HUGE tanks and they will be happy net your selection and stun the fish by whacking it on the floor.
hkmarket1

While you’re on the Asian food tip: Check out the one of the following reputable joints.

1 Comment

Posted in food, Uncategorized, urban, westbank

Posted by: noadventure | March 7, 2009

Journey to the Westbank – Part 2: Jean Lafitte Park

JEAN LAFITTE NATIONAL PARK – the only national park in Louisiana.

elevated-boardwalk

Dude, this place is rad. Hike the Coquille Trail on a sunny spring day and you are guaranteed to see alligators sunning themselves on the banks of the marsh. It’s never crowded with people, but sometimes choice spots get crowded with gators.
gators coquille-chinese

You can also find barred owls, deer, armadillos, turtles, tons of snakes, swamp rabbits, woodpeckers, gigantic frogs, and huge SPIDERS!
barred_owl_crawfish

Mostly I see gators when I go, but once I went at night and saw a couple of foxes! It was creepy as hell. You can canoe or kayak in the Kenta Canal or Twin Canals. Like I said, Coquille Trail is best for gators, but there are other trails that offer different stuff. Plus it’s all FREE and the facility is really nice and clean(let’s keep it that way, assholes). Here’s how to get there:

From Interstate 10, take Highway 90 West (this interchange is near the Superdome) across the Mississippi River. The double-span bridge crossing the river is called the Crescent City Connection. Proceed five miles. After crossing the Harvey Canal on a higher portion of the expressway, exit the highrise of Highway 90 (Westbank Expressway) at the Barataria Blvd Exit. Once off the ramp move right one lane on the lower portion of Highway 90. Pass the first traffic light (Ave. D.) and turn left from this lane at the second traffic light (Barataria Blvd). This road merges from 4 lanes to 2 lanes at Ames Blvd. (3 miles). Continue 5 miles to the preserve’s entrance.

Also: use common sense – it’s a swamp; there might be mosquitos.

Click here for PART 3.

Journey to the Westbank – Part 1: Algiers Point

Ever wonder what’s on the other side of the Mississippi River?
I know Magazine St. is really cool, but you may want to take an NOadventure to the other side of the river just to explore things like:

ALGIERS POINT – historic neighborhood older than the French Quarter.

Tip: go on your bike and take the ferry – it’s free.
16320432algierspointferry

Once you get off the Canal St. Ferry and set foot on the Westbank, you’ll walk down an old cobblestone street. In the old days, these stones were used as ballasts to weight down boats that came to the port of New Orleans to fill up on goods. The leftover stones made great pavers. Keep walking and you’ll end up at the Dry Dock(prime happy-hour spot) – right at the bottom of the hill.

The Crown and Anchor is an English Pub owned by a real authentic British dude. Their pub quiz on thursdays at 8pm can get crowded, but it’s crazy fun. They also have old mugs hanging from hooks on the ceiling rafters. Maybe if you are a super regular, you get to have your own mug? I’m not sure.
crown-anchor-photo1

These little neighborhood bars rival Mid-City in their neighborhoodiness and they always seem to have good food.

Besides the pubs and the fresh air, Algiers Point is also the spot to watch fireworks on New Years Eve or July 4th. Crawl up on the levee and watch the show over the river whilst the New Orleans skyline twinkles.

Also: The ferry is great and FREE and everything, but can you believe we used to have this sky cable gondola across the river from the Warehouse District to Algiers Point?
nolagondola1984cmakin1

Talk about AWESOME! They called this thing Mississippi Aerial River Transit or MART and built it for the 1984 World’s Fair. It’s red steel towers on opposite banks of the river were the tallest ever constructed for a gondola lift and the cars made the 4 minute ride 300 feet above the river.
83928426mqbzbi_fs

Got this from WIKI: Built to showcase a form of non-polluting commuter transit, after the fair, the system was open for use by commuters. By April 1985, the system was shut down due to low ridership.

WHAT? Could you even imagine having that sucker now with yo-yoing gas prices and parking downtown? Tons off people would move to the westbank just BECAUSE of that thing. How great would it be just to have that as bonus attraction to our already unique city? Don’t even want to think about life without MART anymore. Moving on.

Go to Part 2 -Jean Lafitte National Park.

2 Comments

Posted in bicycling, food, historical, socializing, urban, westbank

Posted by: noadventure | March 5, 2009